Rerun #2

Hello Family, Friends and People of the Internet,

Since I haven't had time to blog and will once again be out of pocket for the next couple of days, I am posting another rerun. Here's the annual Cruz letter from January 2007. Enjoy!

Dear Family and Friends,

We know this letter is really late and that my prediction from last year of Saban leading the Dolphins to the Superbowl probably won’t materialize. Anyway, Feliz Ano Nuevo from Miami! I know you didn't ask for an update on the Cruz household, but like those annoying stock recommendation and mortgage refinancing spam emails, you're gonna get one anyway. In the last year, Carol and I dug ourselves out of the snow piles of Newport, Rhode Island and landed in the blistering heat of south Florida. We hope you are living la vida loca in your own version of tropical paradise. Just in case you didn't know, the worst places in the country for traffic accidents are Jersey City, NJ and Miami, FL. So what happens on my first day of house hunting in Miami? Some guy smashes into my rental car. This guy must've been thinking, "well, I saw this in a cartoon once – I think I can do it." Long story short - wasn't my fault but I got sued anyway and the guy gets $50,000 of insurance money. I felt like the new James Bond, naked and sitting in that chair with no seat, waiting for another hit on the danglers. Go see "Casino Royale" for the full effect. Awesome movie by the way. If they would've added a couple of very corny scenes to that movie, they could've named it "Casino Royale with Cheese." Go see "Pulp Fiction" for the full effect. I digress.

We ended up buying a house, site unseen. Little did I know that the lake behind this house would forever change my life. Because of this lake, I discovered the meaning of life - FISHING! I am hooked! The difference between crack cocaine and fishing is that you can quit crack. Matter of fact, I'm questioning my own judgment right now because I'm wondering why I'm writing this letter when I could be fishing. For those of you that haven't fought a nice large mouth bass, you don't know what you're missing. My lovely bride is doing great as usual. Every now and then Carol surprises me by straightening out her curly hair. She looks totally different with the straight locks - so much so that I feel like I'm cheating. Who is this stranger I’m getting down with? Carol stays extremely busy as the family CEO. I have great respect for all you stay-at-home moms out there. Carol reminds me how her life is ruled by poop. Every day it's changing poopy diapers and picking up Fred's poop in the yard. She also makes sure that Jake gets his daily prune intake otherwise he won't produce good poops. Not to mention CJ's newest habit of forgetting to flush the toilet after he drops the kids off at the pool. Nothing a few good beatings won't fix.

Speaking of our non-flusher, CJ's doing fantastic. Star Wars, superheroes, books, Legos and just recently, his teddy bear, are this 8 year old's favorite things. CJ's not on the honor roll but he beat up an honor roll kid the other day. Kidding of course. The kid he beat up was only a "C" student. Of course CJ is on the honor roll - he's a CRUZ! He recently overcame a major hurdle. For the first time ever, he was able to watch the scene from "Return of the Jedi" where Darth Vader removes his helmet. No more running out of the room when that scene comes on. It was actually anti-climactic for CJ to see a pasty British white guy underneath that evil black helmet.

Jake is doing well too. What an awesome baby. According to the doctor, Jake hasn't gained a single ounce in 8 months. I'm sure the doctor's office made absolutely zero errors with their highly accurate, balls-on weighing procedures. Just look at the kid. He's a chunk of lead. Not sure about Jake adding on pounds but I've definitely witnessed him getting rid of a few. It’s like looking into the eye of the sun. The latest issue is that Carol thinks Jake is a little cross-eyed. No way was my reaction. That is until this lady behind us in a Wal-mart line pointed out to us that Jake is cross-eyed. Who did she think she was? An ophthalmologist? Turns out she was. So he’s a little cross-eyed. Not a big deal. Nothing a few good beatings won't fix.

So what big event was worthy enough to mention in the annual Cruz Holiday letter? Since I was on the poop topic earlier, I might as well continue with that theme. We love having company. This summer, we had ten family members staying at the house for an incredibly fun visit. Along with the ten people comes the heavy demand on the toilet. Eventually, the showers, sinks and toilets all started to bubble and finally back up. What a nightmare! Those disgustingly graphic dismemberment scenes from these new scary movies are nothing compared to the terror of the water slowly rising in that backed-up toilet bowl, the unsavory contents of the bowl about to plummet gruesomely onto the floor. The horror! The plumbers eventually came out and dug a huge hole in my driveway in order to get to the main sewer line. A professional team of city workers descended upon the house with their heavy machinery and did a bang up job but we were still without water for about 3 days. So what does the Cruz family do? Make bathroom runs to the nearby Best Buy, wash dishes and our hair outside with the garden hose and most importantly, laugh it all off. The visit was still a ball. The older I get, the more I realize that the best friends you can possibly have are the same folks you grew up with - family. Have a great year everyone and come visit if you can!

With love,

Chris, Carol, CJ, Jacob and Fred

Even this major plumbing problem couldn't keep the Cruz's down!
One of my big discoveries in Miami - I love fishing!

We'll write more when we get back from our family trip to Hong Kong. Until then, take it easy - C2

My Not-So-Little Bro

This blog entry is dedicated to my younger brother, Lee, and all the other hard-charging Special Forces guys out there on the tip of the spear doing the tough jobs. Lee had the movers pack up his stuff the other day in Fayetteville, North Carolina for yet another military move. He's on his way to San Antonio, Texas to begin the next phase of his Army career. Because of his strong record, Lee recently got picked up for a highly competitive special program where upon completion of his training, he will become a Physician's Assistant. He will also be commissioned as an officer in the US Army. You go Lee!

This will be quite the change from jumping out of airplanes, going on dangerous patrols and dodging bullets. After multiple deployments to Afghanistan, God was undoubtedly watching over my bro.


Lee is in the middle of this picture. He was the Medical Sergeant on his Special Forces team. A big part of Lee's job was distributing medication and treating the local Afghan folks with their medical problems. Somehow, those type of stories don't make it in the newspapers.


Notice Lee's valiant attempt to grow a moustache and beard in order to blend in with his desert environment. I am also cursed with that Fu Manchu style of facial hair growth.


Living in the desert and still smiling!


Here is Lee with all of his "flair" on. He recently got selected for E-8. It'll be a quick stint as E-8 since he'll be getting commissioned as an officer soon. That's another big transition for Lee - enlisted to officer. The change from eating MREs (meals ready to eat) to tea and crumpets might be a little taxing on his digestive system.

A rare treat - Lee home for the holidays! Mom and Lee are standing in front of my sister Darby's Christmas tree. Side note - Here's how Darby buys her Christmas tree every year. She tells the guy, get me the biggest tree you have on the lot. If you're gonna be a bear, be a grizzly!

I'm thinking one of the best things with Lee getting picked up for this program is getting some well-deserved normalcy in his life, at least for a little while. As many of you know, the military life is challenging with all of the moves, deployments and family separation. Lee, I hope you're able to squeeze in a lot of normalcy in San Antonio - like more football and more fishing.

Speaking of football, this is from Lee and Beanie's visit to Miami where we saw the Cowboys play the Dolphins. Although for me, watching the Dolphins get pounded was like getting a pine cone shoved up my butt backwards, it was still an awesome time because my Cowboy fan brothers enjoyed it so much. The video clip is the post-game celebration/mourning, depending on which team you rooted for. Keep in mind that this game was in Miami. Click on the video to get the full effect.

Lee and I are both freshwater fishing fanatics. Some of my best memories in Miami are me and Lee catching fish in the lake in my backyard. Here's Lee catching his first Peacock Bass. I'm thinking one of Lee's biggest challenges in San Antonio might be to put the fishing pole down and hit the books instead.

Another side note. Ladies out there, what do you think about this idea from Lee? Instead of the crude, neanderthal-style bachelor party, Lee is thinking of doing a bass fishing gala with the boys in lieu of the whole stripper pole, clear high heels and lapdance thing. It'll be a Basstravaganza. I can't wait! This could be the start of a national trend.

Lee, the family couldn't be prouder of you. We know you'll do great with your studies and the next phase in your career. We wish only the best for you and Cathy. I know you'll miss your days as an SF soldier. Having flown what was probably my last tactical Navy flight, I might have an inkling of what you're going through. We're all grateful you made it back in one piece. Many can't say the same. I don't know what our country would do without men like you. Proud to be your bro - Chris

Latest w/ the Boys

Ah, chilling out on a Sunday morning. Just finished scarfing down some biscuits and gravy, a Carol favorite. Now she has some apple cinnamon biscuits coming out of the oven. It's carb-loading Sunday I guess. I've come to the conclusion that it's much easier to just accept who you are - extra pounds and all, rather than work out diabolically to get your body in the shape it was when you were 23. What if soft and gooey bodies became the "in" thing? Wouldn't that be awesome? I feel so terrible for David Haselhoff and all those times he had to suck in that gut during the "Baywatch" years. Just let it go and love yourself man. Look at that wallowing mud mammal of a man, Jack Nicholson. Everybody loves him. Everyone - just let those six pack abs go. It'll be all right.

I'm looking out the window at the BEXCO crowd lining up for whatever event is going on down there. BEXCO is the Busan Exposition/Convention Center which is right across the street from us. They hold many cultural and family events there but most importantly to the boys, they've got a McDonalds and a Dipping Dots ice cream place.

Life is busy but good here in Korea. We've definitely gotten into our groove. Carol joined the BIWA - Busan International Womens Association and stays busy with BIWA meetings, volunteering, raising the boys and pleasing her man.

CJ has become quite the socialite at school. For some reason, the little kindergarteners like to chase him down during recess and he accomodates them. He's just as comfortable hanging out with the older kids too. Yeah, I think he's liking the school. He did get in trouble recently though. He mistakenly only finished half of his homework paper and got a bad grade because of it. No computer for a week. I think he would've preferred the old school filipino beat down instead. During the no computer week, he actually had to use the dictionary instead of www.dictionary.com to look up and define his vocabulary words. The horror! Parents, I suggest you get the little ones into an actual hard copy dictionary at least a couple of times so they know how to really use it. BTW, CJ just looked over my shoulder and said he wants to do another blog post. Something about his computer suspension. Stand by for that.

Here is a picture of CJ participating in an art contest at the United Nations Memorial Cemetery. The kids were supposed to draw something at the cemetery that inspired them. The only rule was that they were to produce their drawings by themselves. To the right of CJ, I caught this father helping his son with his art project. As you can see, the Koreans take education very seriously here. If you look closely, I also captured some of the father's butt crack.

More pics of the cemetery:

The cemetery is a very moving place. Carol and I were explaining the significance of the cemetery to CJ. We showed him the names of the deceased that were inscribed on the many walls. Later in the day, as CJ was drawing his project, he started to get real quiet. He actually shed a couple of tears. He told us that the meaning of the place just overwhelmed him. I hated that he got sad, but I really think he got it.

And then there's Jake...hmm.

The man holding the bullhorn is Mr. Scott Jolly, the Principal of Busan Foreign School. When the Principal visited Jake's nursery class, Jake told the Principal, "I'm gonna throw you out the window!" That little guy is fast becoming a stinker. He's gotten his name written on the board by the teacher a couple of times now. Not a good thing. He's even been caught trying to erase his name off the board. Might be time to break out the open hand smack.

Here is CJ and some of his classmates singing for the International Olympic Committee at a very big event at the BEXCO. He even got his picture in the "Dynamic Busan" newspaper. Notice that he's holding a girl's hand. Pretty good blackmail material.

Better go for now. Don't forget to vote. C2

Rerun #1

Because I've been woefully remiss in my blogging duties, I've decided to post this old letter from back in February 08 to remind folks of how we ended up in Korea. I'll get back to blogging for real when the dust settles sometime in the next year or two. Until then, enjoy. Disclaimer: I made some small edits to the letter because some editing functions didn't transfer too well when I copied and pasted onto the blog. Until next time - C2

February 2008

Friends and Family,

Raise your tray tables, place your seat backs in the forward position and strap on your seatbelts! It’s time for the Cruz’s totally random time of the year annual letter. I hope you have just as big of a lungbuster of a good time reading it as we’ve had living it out. I have to blame my tardiness with this letter on several factors. One, my month long euphoric stupor over the Dolphins’ lone victory over the Ravens. Two, the Grinch attempting to steal Christmas at the Cruz household. More on that later. And three, reality television. By the way, because of the hiring of Bill Parcells, I’ve recently stepped away from the window ledge of the tenth story of a tall building. Big Tuna and the Dolphins. Mark it down – Championship!

The family is doing well. Although Carol and I don’t consider ourselves obese by any means, we have disgusted ourselves recently to the point that we’re both looking to get back in shape. Because I think I saw Carol rewinding the Tivo to take a second glance at Titan from American Gladiators, I’m doing my best to buff up the bod. You never know when the bride might be looking for an upgrade. CJ has now read more books than I did during my entire time at the Naval War College. He wants to be a writer when he grows up, which is great because of the job security. Writers never go on strike. Jake has taken to saying some of the best bedtime prayers ever. “Dear God. Thank you for my family. Thank you for my home. Thank you for parmesan cheese. Amen.” Parmesan cheese makes everything better.

Carol and I hope your 2007 was as good as ours…wait a minute. No we don’t. Carol had some heart problems, I got passed over for command, Fred needed surgery, USAA dumped our home insurance, I didn’t get picked up for the Permanent Military Professor program and our house was broken into twice. The icing on the cake was the house getting burglarized just days before Christmas and having our presents stolen from under the Christmas tree. My guess is that the folks who did this not only want to go to H-E-double hockey sticks, but they must want to take the express train there.

As bad as the initial shock was over this burglary, the outpouring of generosity and kindness from my shipmates at US Southern Command, CJ’s school and our neighbors was incredibly heartwarming. Carol and I spent the day after the robbery doing some emergency replacement gift shopping. The following day at work, I returned to an unbelievable sight. My desk area was overflowing with gifts for the boys. I know that all of you consider me to be a model of manliness but I was really close to shedding tears right there at work. CJ’s school also did a collection and presented the family with an envelope of money and gift cards - which I immediately took to the track to bet on my favorite horse. Just kidding. I took it to the casino instead. Yes, we did feel uncomfortable with accepting these gifts. We felt the right thing to do was accept some of the gifts and donate the rest. It was a good opportunity for us to show CJ how folks should give back to help others. Although the Grinch - or some of his henchmen anyway - tried to steal Christmas, we refused to let it get us down. Rather than dwell on the negative act of a few bad apples, what my family will always remember is the incredible goodwill displayed by many thoughtful people. What began as an unfortunate event transformed into such a wonderful act of love and a long-lasting Christmas memory.

I don’t want to come across that 2007 was a bad year. On the contrary, 2007 held many memorable events for the Cruz’s. Carol and I finally got baptized! I have no idea why we waited so long. We’ve really enjoyed our church and have been more involved than we’ve ever been in the past. I had the privilege of being the Executive Officer for our Deputy Commander at Southcom. The year I spent working for General Spears was an incredibly rewarding experience. I was also promoted to Commander a year ago. And to finish off the year, we had a heck of a holiday visit from the entire Cruz family. We feasted, laughed, played games, watched movies, went fishing and just really enjoyed each other’s company. In short, 2007 was not too shabby at all.

Two simple words also helped to make 2007 a memorable year - soy milk. Being lactose intolerant, I’m now able to once again partake in one of the great joys of my childhood – scarfing down a big bowl of Golden Grahams cereal. Okay, so the soy milk turns my poop green but that’s a small price to pay. Darn, I told myself I wasn’t going to write about poop again in this year’s annual letter. I’ve failed miserably. Since I’ve already broached the poop topic (WARNING for the faint of heart – please skip to the next paragraph if you are easily skeeved out), Jake has taken to potty training rather well. Carol and I do the goofy parent thing and heap praise on Jake as if he’s just won the Nobel Peace Prize whenever he produces his stinky little shooey in his potty chair. While making one of his very first shooeys, Carol and I were rejoicing with Jake and letting him know what a good job he had done. Trumpets were blaring, birds were chirping and all was right with the world. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I saw this white, furry flash near the potty chair. My heart began to race uncontrollably as I realized the HORROR of what had just transpired. Our dog Fred had just made an afternoon snack out of the shooey! Instantaneously, jubilation turned to extreme disgust. NOOOOO!!! Carol and I did our best to execute our consequence management plan but those efforts would only slightly mitigate the abominable image that was now permanently scarred in our brains. For a split second, the Filipino in me thought of doing diabolical things to the dog, but those thoughts subsided. Plus I wasn’t very hungry.

And now for our big news. We’re going to Korea! I've been selected to be the Commanding Officer of Military Sealift Command, Korea stationed in Busan, Korea. The whole family will be going for this two year tour. I'll probably report to Korea in late May. Carol and the kids will come after the school year is completed. I thought the window for me to become Mr. Big Pants Commanding Officer had closed. I’m glad I was wrong. I officially take over the command on 20 June. I can’t tell you how excited I am about this opportunity to lead. Besides, I’ve never dropped trow in the Far East. The travel opportunities are tremendous - Thailand, Hong Kong, Singapore, Tokyo, New Zealand, Australia, etc. We can also visit Mom & Dad in the Philippines. We’re excited about our first overseas duty and the big city living we’ll experience in Busan. Korea boasts the number ten economy in the world and Busan’s skyline is one of the top 50 in the world. So you world travelers out there - come on out and visit the Cruzers! We dare you!

The older I get, the more I realize that the plans I try to force upon myself usually get all jacked up. But the plan that God lays out for us – well, it’s awesome. I know that just in the past year, some of you have experienced deaths in the family, had serious medical issues, marital problems, issues with the kids and maybe things not going so great at work. I hope that you handle the challenges that come your way with enthusiasm, energy and an eye on a positive outcome. May you turn potential obstacles into opportunities. Or at least into parmesan cheese. Here’s to a blessed 2008 for you and your family!

All the best,

Chris, Carol, CJ, Jake and Fred

Fred, the white flash

Christmas 2007

Garden Party and World Walk

Hello everyone! Here's another slice of Korea for you. Some random pics for your viewing pleasure.



This is the Busan Foreign School (BFS) that CJ and Jake attend. We are extremely happy with the school. The Principal and entire staff are very professional and just seem to be a really good group. On this day, other nearby schools visited for a friendly field day competition, including the International Busan School (IBS). IBS was the other school Carol and I were considering for the boys. After CJ got to hang out with some of the IBS students and staff, he said we definitely chose the right school. Besides, who wants to go to a school that has the same initials as Irritable Bowel Syndrome?


This is me and Lieutanant Colonel Tripp Blanton - a great American, Citadel grad and Commanding Officer of 837 Transportation Battalion. MSCO Korea and 837 Trans are the main players at Pier 8 where I work. Tripp and I took charge of our respective commands on the same day in a joint (Army and Navy) change of command ceremony. On this evening, we, along with our lovely brides, attended the Annual Korean American Garden Party. To get the full fru-fru effect of this event, you must stick out your pinky, lift up your chin an extra twenty degrees into the air and say, "Gaaahh-den Paahh-ty", because it wasn' t a "Garden Party"; it was a "Gaaahh-den Paahh-ty". Of course Tripp and I did our best to dumb down the event with brown liquor.



Speaking of lovely brides, here is Carol and Martie. What would we do without our better halves?

My XO and I got to meet the Mayor of Busan recently at a big Anti-Terrorism Demonstration. I mentioned my idea of backing people away from airport baggage claim carousels so that it would be easier for everyone to retrieve their bags. I think he liked the idea.


Here's CJ and other kids from the Busan Foreign School at the starting line for a big "World Walk" event. Many different countries throughout the world had World Walk events on the same day. It drew over 20,000 walkers in Busan. The folks in orange jackets are International Olympic Committee members and distinguished guests from Busan. That's the Mayor of Busan right behind CJ.


This pic gives you an idea of how big this World Walk was. The building in the middle of the picture is where we live. We are right across the street from the BEXCO, a big convention center. There is always something happening at the BEXCO. Oh, I forgot to tell you. The goal of the World Walk was to draw attention to a very important cause - to back people away from airport baggage claim carousels so it's easier for folks to retrieve their bags. Thanks Mayor!
Enough silliness for now. Have a great day! C2

WWSPD?

This is me, Carol and Ms. Chang at a farewell function for the Ambassador. Ms. Chang is a member of my staff and a very wonderful person. The Ambassador really liked the eagle ice sculpture that I carved for him.



On the left is Ms. Kang, our new Admin Assistant. Next to her is Lieutenant Commander Ray Franklin, my Executive Officer, or XO in Navy talk. As you can see, I am a normal-sized person in Korea while Ray is freakishly huge. His hugeness comes in handy when I need to be left alone to finish ice sculptures.

Here is the Cruz family enjoying Gwangalli beach. Jake is checking out a three year old hottie. There was an art thing happening in Busan at the time. The red and silver thing to the right is one of several living art displays on the beach.


I honestly wasn't sure whether this was a living art display. I don't smoke by the way, but I do extinguish entire books of lit matches on my tongue.

Can you tell that we like Busan?

This is one of the potential nurseries for Jake that we decided not to go with.


Well, it's me again. I hope you enjoyed CJ and Jake's blog entries. I know I cracked up typing them. I definitely see a potential writer in CJ. His new teacher thinks so too. Speaking of his new teacher, Carol and I are ecstatic that CJ is in Ms. Taylor's class. She is such a nice and impressive individual. As CJ mentioned earlier, she was in the Olympics when she was younger as a synchronized swimmer. The only problem is that I feel obligated to suck in my gut every time I'm around her.

I greatly overestimated the amount of time I'd have to blog. Work has been extremely busy. Like I've told folks before, with most jobs, the workload never really changes. There's always going to be something after you complete that big project. What does change is our ability to handle that workload. Maybe a few years ago when you were trying to juggle multiple high level taskers, you might've stressed out, curled up in the fetal position and shoved your thumb into your pie hole. Fast forward a few years. Now that same workload doesn't seem so bad. My work days really do fly by here in Korea. Some days, I peek at my watch and realize I've missed lunch by a couple of hours again - which isn't such a bad thing, especially when I'm looking to trim my gut.

Time to say good night to the boys. Just one last thing while I'm on the work topic. When you're faced with difficult decisions and things seem overwhelming - just do what I do and ask yourself, "What would Sarah Palin do?" Non-partisanally yours - C2

Not To Be Outdone - Jake's First Blog Entry!

From Jake, with typing assistance from Dad:

My teacher is very good. I have some CDs. I have Bob the Builder and Thomas. My Dad gave me his old MP3 player because I couldn't leave my big brother's alone. I like playing with Charlene at school. I got my name written on the board because I pulled Hannah's hair. And then Hannah got in trouble. Actually, just me. Someone gave me some dried fish on the train. I don't like to rest at school. I like to rest at home. I want them to get the car seats back in the bus. My splinter grew out and Mommy pulled it. I got a spanking yesterday because I runned away, almost in the street. I have a bus at school. I like my CDs. How is the weather? It's sunny here, at school and at home. I love my brother. This email is done. Bye bye! J-A-K-E spells Jake.